MARRIAGE – TWENTY SEVEN & COUNTING

Uncategorized

“What?! You’re still not married?

How old are you now?”

Thank you for your concern in my personal affairs. Thank you for taking the time out from your busy schedule to remind me that I am not yet married. Because surprisingly enough until you mentioned it,  it hadn’t crossed my mind. You see it’s easy to forget in a community where everyone is married at the first signs of puberty, that you don’t have another human being titled ‘husband’ by your side!

Community. It’s supposed to give you a sense of belonging, instead it’s the very foundation that can sometimes makes your life a living hell. And no,  I am not being dramatic, I’m simply fed up. It’s a hot topic amongst a majority these days. Almost every social gathering involves a discussion of ‘marriage’ which is usually headed by the ever so loving ‘aunties’ and married women. “Do you not want to get married?” ” Have you not found someone yet?” “You should have found someone at University.” “Where are you going to find someone now?” “Oh I know someone, he was married but now he’s divorced, he’s looking for someone your age.”

Oh how very considerate and thoughtful of you! Oh, the assumed superiority by these women! Let’s not forget their men however, they don’t hold back either. Fathers, approaching other fathers asking them why their daughter isn’t married yet. Paying no attention to the consequences of their ill remarks. Perhaps they don’t realise their apparent patronising nature when they’re making these remarks.

I may be in my late twenties and I may not have a husband or kids, but I know what I do have. I have the gratitude towards God for blessing me with a loving family, two beautiful parents that I will never tire of attending to. I have the benefit of education, that has opened my mind in more ways than one. I have experienced life in so many different colours having travelled the world. I, have countless blessings. But most of all I have patience and faith in the One who has already decided a time for me. And so I will wait. I will wait until it is my time. I am in no rush to outrun destiny.

Until then I apologise to all those of you who are enduring ‘anxiety’ at my passing age and my state of affairs. But I respectfully suggest that you sit back and relax, and wait until I’m married to ask me “why don’t you have any kids yet?.”

Of course the cycle is never ending.

@Ufshah

Photo Credits: stefhaneiskandar on Instagram

CHILDREN OF WAR

poems, Uncategorized

 

“Mum, why are you not speaking?”

She pulls her child close,

rests his head upon her chest,

turning his face away from her cheeks,

tears rolling from her eyes as she silently weeps.

 

The house they once called home,

is now a cemetery where her remaining family sleeps.

 

Her heart rages inside,

“I did not choose to be a victim of war,

My child did not choose to be a child of war,

If I scream loud enough will you hear me?

If the blood from these bodies bleeds into your oceans

will you pay attention to the cries hitting your shores?”

 

My child,

he is only five,

yet he has witnessed the falling of the skies.

Pointing at the stars,

screaming,

asking me why,

“Mum, why are the stars exploding and buildings falling?” ⠀⠀⠀

 

“Close your eyes my child,

these stars have been sent by your family,

the one we call ‘humanity.” ⠀⠀⠀

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

– Children of war, U.F. Shah

Screen Shot 2015-12-01 at 23.44.49

Photograph taken by Sam Tarling @oxfamamerica of a woman holding her child while bombs fall on the street outside.

The British Government are voting regarding the bombing of Syria. Please don’t stay silent. #dontbombsyria #saynotowar

 

WAR

aspiringwriter, blogger, editorial, media, poems, poet, reflections, Uncategorized, writer, writing

What is it that carries us through the whirlwinds of life? Is it the ones that we love that give us the strength to survive? Or is it our careers? Is it our faith?

What is it?

Ever wonder how people fight battles on a daily basis. Heartbreak, illness, death, finance, job loss. All different, yet a battle nonetheless.

Warriors. We are all warriors.

Yes, we do not go to war, at least not the type of wars that we’ve learned of from our history books.

Yet we do stand on the frontline every morning, when we raise our bodies out of our beds and face the world.

Yes, we do not go to war, at least not the type of war that we’ve learned of from our history books.

But we do dress ourselves in armour, and hope to miss the bullets.

Yes, we do not go to war, but we ‘are’ at war.

A war that won’t be found in our history books. A war that has failed to be defined. A war that we wage against ourselves. The war that seems to have no end. Generations after generations become victims, and the cycle continues with every breath.

But let’s not silence our triumphs or forget. Warriors.

We are all warriors.

@ufshah

THE SILENT WITNESS

aspiringwriter, blogger, editorial, media, reflections, religion, review, tedtalks, writing

“In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.”- Martin Luther King, Jr.

I have heard this quote many a times, however I found that Clint Smith brought this to life, in his spoken word piece presented as part of TED Talks. Being a regular viewer of TED Talks, I always find my brain cells being challenged. I am always inspired or left with something to ponder over, at the very least. If you haven’t already watched one, I strongly recommend that you do!

So going back to the talk I was referring to by Clint Smith – The danger of silence. This particular talk struck a chord with me. I guess we are all victim to our very own silence at some stage in our lives. Although communication through silence can be powerful in given contexts, this video makes reference to silence in the negative form.

So how do you know your silence is damaging? Ever get that feeling when you’ve  failed to speak up, and upon reflection you’re filled with guilt.  You are not short of words, yet your mouth feels as though it has been bolted shut. A type of silence caused by your mouth drying up like a leaf soaked in the sun. A silence that pains you.

The speaker says he teaches his students to “read critically, write consciously, speak clearly and tell your truth.” At this point of the talk, the guilt in me rushed to my eyes in the form of tears. “Tell your truth.” I guess when you’ve kept silent through the moments you wish you hadn’t, through the moments you’d wished you were able to release the chaos of words drumming against your chest, bouncing off your mind, yet unable to reach your tongue;  you are left with nothing but guilt.  Guilt filling your body, attempting to find any means of escape.

My truth. My truth is that I am also a victim of silence.

“So sometimes I wouldn’t say anything, appeasing ignorance with my silence, unaware that validation doesn’t need words to endorse its existence.”

Witnessing atrocities taking place around the world each and every day. Witnessing them and remaining silent. Failing to speak. I wonder how a television screen became so powerful. Powerful enough to distance us from the reality of the sufferings of the human race. How do we become immune to their pain? Or is it that we just can’t seem to relate? After all we feel protected, knowing we’ll never be exposed to such things.

I have always believed that our tongue is our most powerful weapon, yet I have not mastered the art of it’s use. Perhaps I need training in a class called knowledge. For what use are my words if their manipulation makes me rank amongst the ignorant.

My written words are generally fuelled by nothing other than emotion, however unfortunately in most circumstances, emotion alone is not enough. Instead knowledge is power.

I silence myself, whilst the words of others leave wounds so deep, that nothing other than faith can fill. I tell myself I will speak. I will speak once I have learned all that there is to learn. I tell myself each and every day “Educate yourself.” Educate yourself so that you can share your knowledge. So that you can fight ignorance with that which you have learned. For such a battle does not require weapons of mass destruction. My tongue will surely be enough.

And one day, I know “I will live every day as if there were a microphone tucked under my tongue.”

@ufshah